It has been a while since I last posted on here. Between work, gaming and two web shows, I manage to fill my days up quite successfully.

I’ve been feeling a bit odd the last couple of days. Probably a little overwhelmed with everything that has been happening combined with some kind of fatigue.

It has recently been a time of contemplation for me – thinking about what I want and where I’m headed.

Work has been increasingly demanding, but I still haven’t been officially placed in the role that I have been doing for the last 9 months! Now I hear that management want to wait another two months before they decide.

What would you do in this situation? It seems to me to be a case of trying to get me doing a job without paying me what I’m worth. Grrrr.

Then there is relationships. I’m still single and not doing too well in the realm of romance. The worst part is that I can’t even get the motivation to try and meet a guy at the moment.

To be honest, I’m in that kind if frame of mind that I don’t feel like I have the energy to love someone anymore. Every man I have loved felt nothing for me. It kind of gets disheartening when you’re pushing into the mid thirties and have never been in a romantic relationship that wasn’t one-sided.

*le sigh*

I’m not depressed, just a little jaded at the moment. With so much going on in my life, it gets challenging to balance it all.

I guess this new show means a lot to me because it is about how hard it us to be gay, over 30 and still single. How guys like that tend to begin to expect the worst and start settling for security over love.

I really don’t want to be that guy.

Like I said at the start if this – so much going on it’s beginning to overwhelm me. šŸ™‚